just when the dark isnt enough to make me sleepy

sakit… ang nasasa isip,

lungkot… ang naidudulot..

sa muli at muli mong pagsulpot,

sa balintataw na pilit nililimot.

pabiling – biling… pabali baligtad…

ikot dito, ikot doon…

ano’t di matukoy,

ang ninanais na posisyon

- March 25 2005

sa loob ng mahabang panahon,

dala ko ang natatanging pagkakataon,

nang ang iyo at aking paningi’y magkatuon.

mula noon, pag-ibig sa pusoy sumibol,

pagmamahal at pagtingin

ay patuloy na yumabong.

ngunit, minsan may di nakadama,

munti mang pagkalinga mula’t mula pa,

dahil tila ang pag-ibig na pinapangarap,

ay nagmumula lamang sa isang akala.

sa kabila ng lahat,

araw at gabing ika’y naaalala,

pagsambit ng pangalan mo,

kasama sa pagbuntong hininga.

tama na tama na,

madalas na isipin,

ngunit ang naisin,

ay kaiba sa damdamin.

hanggang kailan dadalhin,

ang bigat na pasanin,

hungkag na pusoy,

tila nangunguluntoy na rin.

tama na puso tama na,

dinggin yaring panaghoy,

dahil dapat na pakatandaang,

puso ri’y naluluoy.

- October 1, 2007

Bakit minamahal ka?

Mula noon, hanggang ngayon,

ikaw sa puso at isip ay naroon.

Napakahirap na dalahin,

sakit sa puso ay pasanin.

Munting saya ay madarama

sa sandali na tayo’y magkita.

Ngunit takot sa dibdib ay tuwi-tuwina

Lalo’t ikay di kasama.

Anong ligaya ang kamtan,

sa tuwing ang balat sa balat ng bisig ay nadarama.

ilang taon na nga mula ng magkita,

ngunit hanggang ngayon, damdami’y di nag-iiba.

Ang uring ito ng puso ay nag-iisa,

dadalhin hanggang sa huling hininga.

Minamahal nga ba kita?

- March 17, 2008

An Experience to Remember: THE WAY I USED TO FIT MYSELF IN

My journey as a high school student is no exemption from the general rule. It is and has been the best part of everyone’s life, as I did.

Joining the 1st section in my 3^rd year brought fear with no end. Coming from a lower section, I sought the assistance of my 2^nd year adviser to intervene and transfer me at least to the 2^nd section. Assumptions were all over me, tied with the notion of isolation and discrimination; I worked hard to change my fate.

Destiny it may seem, I found no one to support what I want. I had to face my fear and stay where I hate to. First day was an agony. I felt eyes were all over me. I can recall that I was counting every step that I took and kept my breath at a level where no one will ever notice my presence. Second day was almost the same.

Ice broke on the 3^rd day when I began small talks with my seatmate and it improved as days passed by. I started jelling in when I observed that I easily relate in the class discussion especially in the Elementary Statistics. I was not an exceptional student but my abilities can be gauged at their level. I am neither behind nor advanced of anyone in the class.

From then on, I realized that I need not fear anyone. I was made part of their class because there were people who believe that I can make it. It did not make sense to me initially but now I know why. God has something good that I will cherish for life.

Currently, our section leads the planning in the grand reunion to be held next year. We have just launched the website of our batch where we also spearheaded its development. We expect less than the actual members of the batch 1990 but we hope that next year’s event will re-live what we had 19 years ago. We are what we are because of the people we had, learning how to fit in and lived in. High school life, then, is a laboratory of life for adults to be. And I will never find the joy of being with people I treasure now if things happened otherwise.